Peruvian Soccer Players Drugged

Peruvian Soccer Players Drugged

Peruvian soccer players started collapsing on the field this past Sunday in a clash between Sport Ancash and Hijos de Acosvinchos.

With a promotion to the top tier on the line,Peruvian soccer team Sport Ancash resorted to the old "spike the other team's energy drinks with sleep tranquilizers" defense, instead of, you know, trying to win with actual teamwork and effort.

According to Deadspin, "During the match, one team handed the other 'energy drinks.' Four players collapsed, and the drinks turned out to contain tranquilizers.

Not surprisingly, Sport Ancash(the nondrugged team) went on to win the game 30. Hospital tests would later reveal traces of sleepinducing tranquilizer in the Peruvian soccer players' blood.

Like in most countries not named America, soccer tends to be popular, and at times is the only sport to watch and compete in, so it stands to reason that Peruvian soccer teams would resort to a tactic typically reserved for sketchy college students, a party, and an open beer.

Even more amusing was the excuse the opposing Peruvian soccer team's president gave when asked why Peruvian soccer players on the other team were magically dropping like dead weight; Bad barbeque chicken.

"They ate barbecued chicken with spices and ended up taking indigestion tablets afterwards. I'm sure these four men fainted because of that and the physical effort they put in."